21 year old CF suffer Courtney Read writes in incredibly raw, real and revealing terms about life with depression.
I’m not one to usually post about personal emotions n shit.. but here goes..??♀️ no hate..thanks.
To all who deal with difficulties in their lives, you are far from alone.
I just want to say to those who don’t realise I have a terminal illness, which I was born with and for which there is currently no cure, every precious minute counts.
Everyday I find myself hoping for something to ease my pain & my suffering. I’m constantly fighting myself every single day..some days are worse than others..it’s completely unimaginable to me how I’m still here today but I am, mainly because of the people who are still in my life and have been in my life. Don’t ever take what you have in front of you, who you’ve got around you & why they are in your lives for granted. You never know when everything you love & live for will been taken from underneath you leaving you with nothing left worth getting back up for.
I went to the beach Friday night to watch the sunset, listen to nature, the waves crashing, the wind blowing, to embrace life on this earth and to fill up my shitty lungs with fresh air …. after considering ridiculous measures to end it all, after crying and crying all day, my depression scaring the absolute shit out of me & without being able to even explain why, except perhaps being absolutely worn out from feeling & staying strong, fighting not only my condition but my anxiety, depression & the sleepless nights which I deal with too.
I’m not one to cry out for help or attention, in case some people were thinking that this is what this post is about, rather I’m one to listen & help who I possibly can, make their lives a little bit more bearable.. it breaks my heart knowing about people I love or even know going through shit in their lives and almost make it my responsibility do anything to help.
This is me crying out to anyone who is going through shit in their lives..to tell you to reach out to the ones you love and let them give you their shoulder for once to cry on for a while or even cry on each other’s shoulders..either way, it’s ok..it will be ok. I’m not saying it will be straight away.. it’s likely to get worse to get that little bit better..I know from experience??♀️anyway.. keep fighting guys… end of rant..much love, no hate xoxo